On an October morning back in 2002 I was driving through Northern Virginia outside of Washington DC when I grew too tired to drive and decided to pull over for a nap at a rest stop.
I went to bed late the night before and slept on my buddy Joe’s garage floor in Easton Maryland. A few days prior I left my apartment in upstate New York with all of my meager possessions, a few bags of weed, $7500, and my dog to go who knows where.
Other than meeting up with Joe and 2 other friends in Ocean City Maryland for the weekend I had no real plans. All I knew was I had to get out of my home town for a while.
Throughout the preceding week of my trip the media was saturated by stories of people being shot by an unknown shooter in public parking lots. At that time it was unknown that 2 people acted together to commit these crimes. They would later come to be known as The Beltway Snipers or the D.C. Snipers.
My friend’s house was not far from where some some of the shootings occurred. As I rolled out my sleeping bag to crash for the night on Joe’s garage floor we joked of the sniper being out there someplace watching us. Maybe he could see us through the many windows of the overhead garage door.
The next morning after parting ways with Joe I headed out half tired and fully stoned for wherever. I ended up aimlessly driving on a federal highway named after I forgot which one of our many esteemed dead presidents. I eventually pulled into a rest stop to take a nap. I was later awoke by a knock on my window.
As I rolled down the window an officer identifying himself as a U.S. Ranger asked me what I was doing. I told him I was sleeping and I asked him if it was illegal to do so. He told me that it depends on why I’m sleeping. I told him I was sleeping because I was tired (surprise surprise). He then told me the sign over there says “no sleeping” as he pointed at nothing. There was no sign.
I looked like a desperado on the lamb. Not only had I just woke up but my hair was growing out looking all disheveled. My few day old beard was coming in all patchy. The unseasonably warm fall weather had the car wreaking of body oder, dog stench, and stale weed smoke. A single cannabis seed caught the officer’s eye. The officer asked if I had anything else on me. I handed him my pipe from the ashtray hoping he would be satisfied with that. But he wasn’t. He said he can rip my car apart or I can tell him what I’m hiding.
He asked if I had any guns or weapons of any sort on me. Still half awake and somewhat disoriented I reacted to the question at first by giggling. He did not laugh. With his hand clutching his firearm he hollered…
“Get out of the vehicle and put your hands on top of the car!”
I was then handcuffed as the officer interrogated me over my recent activities. He wanted to know where I had been, where I was going, where I was from, why I had all my belongings, and this much money on me.
After he ripped my car apart finding the other 3 or 4 small bags of weed he soon realized I had no guns. I asked him if he was going to let me go now. He said if I had complied in the first place I wouldn’t be going to jail.
Overwhelmed by my situation I held back tears. I had been to jail before. I wasn’t afraid of that. It was the prospect of being locked up while my car and dog are impounded that worried me.
Will I get my money back?
Will I get my car back?
Will I ever see my dog again?
Playing tough the ranger said to me. “You might as well stop crying like a bitch. That won’t do you any good”
As he drove me and my dog to the station I tried to keep my composure while thinking this could be the last time I ever see her. When we got there he told me that providing I have no outstanding charges or warrants he will release me with an appearance ticket.
After being fingerprinted and having mugshots taken I was released with an appearance to be arraigned in like 6 weeks. The officer gave me back my money and drove us back to the rest stop where he dropped us off next to my car. I checked again for a “No Sleeping” sign but there wasn’t one. The only sign there said “Rest Area”.
Regardless I was happy to be leaving in my car with my dog and almost everything I started with. Now I just had to find some more weed.
Thanks for Reading
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